I was the new girl in town…Again!!

(Freshly raped and passed around at least twice by my two older male step-cousins, prior to being uprooted then transplanted in this same old weird paper-mill smelling town during my 7^th grade school year) Except this time, it was for good.. The suicide attempt bought me a good year of freedom back in the safety and nurturing arms of my great grandmother back in my hometown but I just couldn’t seem to get right. Age 10, Still reeling from a traumatic loss of the one stable father figure I’d been blessed since my then teenaged parents proved to be incompetent, the depression teamed with hyper stimulated genitalia was becoming too much for my grieving great grandmother to bare… I would eventually end up rotating between one relative to the next. I cant remember exactly what happened that got me to this point, yet Here I am, the new girl once again…

Sitting in Ms. O’s typing class, in front of me he sits. Braids to the back, toffee colored skin, cover-all jeans creased to the 9, gangsta Nike’s, basketball hoopin, nice flows, project living, all his brothers and sisters had different daddies but HE was the oldest.. I still remember his adams apple, the veins in his arms… On the outside he reminded me of my father. Except he wasn’t 6feet tall and black as midnight but he definitely fit his “thuggish” exterior.. I just KNEW he was gonna take me down through there.. As I sat on the backrow.. quiet as kept.. Never even giving him as much of a good morning… I observed him.. his mannerisms.. how he sharpened his pencil.. how he would make it a POINT to strut across the floor just to shoot paper in the trashcan like he was Jordan or somebody.. “What a show off,” I thought to myself.. As he sat down, a breeze would swoop past my nose and every damn time, i breathed him in.. Adiddas cologne to be exact.. He had no clue that I was preying on him.. Plotting.. subconsciously scheming on HIS purity.. His innocence.. This little “innocent” 8^th grade new girl, Hormones raging, Pussy throbbing to be ravaged again, had chosen her very first prey… The day I became a predator.  See it didn’t stop there. He had a homegirl that sat to his right. Truly platonic until I put my paws on him which ironically made HIM more desirable but I digress. I was watching her too.. She had the cutest laugh, nice smile, teeth weren’t all that straight but I really liked her personality. She sorta reminded me of my mother, except she wasn’t 5’10 dark skin. However, she never really gave me the time of day just like moms… Now had I known what I know now then maybe I would have went for her instead of him but, that’s just not the order of the universe but oh yes.. Im an equal opportunity predator. Ill take you and your partner IF that’s what you’re into… And that’s just the way it is.. Or so ive been programmed.