Tag Archives: shadow work

Clarity, Dark Love, Healing, Mental Health

You’re not as innocent as you think…

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Because everybody’s a victim in 2017, or wants to play one, let me speak directly to those who are so helpless & innocent they can’t tell a broken fe/male from a [mostly] healed one..

I’m going to attempt to keep this brief & to the point. I’ve witnessed a lot of finger pointing going on between which came first chicken or the egg on these internet streets, when in reality they’re both the same chicken, just in different stages of life but I digress.

There’s an ongoing debate on whose at fault for the break down of the black community here in the West, so without getting too deep, let’s just say it’s my fault. 30yrs on this planet & I still view everything outside of me as OUT-SIDE of me.. Just Sit with that one for a minute..

By now you’ve survived all the trauma living in the first world has to offer. I know how tough it is having Indoor plumbing,  access to the front entrance of anywhere you dare to purchase goods & services from, passports to leave and go wherever you want whenever you want.. not having drones bomb your entire neighborhoods, or better yet, having the freedom to parade through public streets full nude & proclaim that others are wrong for not embracing YOUR willingness to be well, butt-naked in public. It’s tough living like this, & things really need to change for the better, I totally get it. You’ve played the victim so long you can’t even tell you’ve actually become your captor.. You’ve actually become the predator we all love to hate.. Let me explain.

Continue reading You’re not as innocent as you think… →

Clarity, Healing, Mental Health

Gross Negligence: Heart Chakra & the 7 stages of grief..

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Throughout this blog, I’ve spoken strictly from the neglected root chakra perspective via childhood sexual trauma. As i work my way up the “self- correcting” ladder that is the chakra system, reprogramming generational effects of  being born in the “first world.” As unsettling as it is, i have to admit that it’s become more evident, that we’re being attacked on all fronts.. simultaneously at the heart & root level.. There’s no reaching the crown without a fully activated heart.. there’s no reaching the heart when the foundation is cracked.. ironically the heart is the only organ standing at the gates that unites the upper 3 & lower 3 chakras. When an organism sees no benefit in its Being FULLY functional, that vital organ no longer has a purpose to fuel said organisms continued survival.

The Map of the Human Heart
The Map of the Human Heart

The heart is such a beautifully chaotic organ. On the surface all we see is the rhythmic pulsating action of said organ’s synchronized chaos involuntarily fighting for a living, breathing [both rebellious ungrateful, by society’s design] organism who refuses to even acknowledge its purposeful existence.

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but before I get too deep, here’s a few meme’s depicting the collective mentality of a population under the influence of westernized “first world” culture.

 

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Self Pity, Depression.. Shock.. Loss.

 

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Self Defense.. fight, flight or freeze.

 

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Groupthink, gang mentality influenced & backed by entertainment/music industry.

And in true westernized society fashion, I present to you… Supplementation.

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Denial, Overworking/Over-extending ourselves into exhaustion… “Work/grind-a-holics” Independent/strong black women.. Facades.

 

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Self Destruction/Sabotage & Escapism,
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More Denial & Escapism..

Acceptance/Introspection.

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Acceptance, Introspection.. Growth.

 

It’s my observation that one has to experience all 7 stages of grief to activate all 7 chakras.. Yes, some stages repeat but that’s only because one hasnt mastered the lesson. Of course this is from a rudimentary perspective as I Am still coming into this Knowing of self. So with that being said, eventually I’ll go more in depth regarding each stage but im going to stop here for now.  Thanks for reading.

 

Erotika..., Healing

Dark Love…

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womaninblack2

 

 

Most beautiful Boogeyman..

Til you play in the shadows of your mind, love, you’ll never be free.. So when you’re ready, I challenge you to Come die with me.. For in death, love has no expiration date.. In my hearts home, i offer you everlasting death/life.. But only when YOU are ready.. til then, Look for me in the shadows of your mind. Love YOU there, first.. So The rest can align..

Signed- Your favorite nightmare ?? #balance #darkYogi #boogeyman #theDragonflyAffect #undertakeYah

Healing, Mental Health, Trauma

The Eulogy: Here lies the Ni*ga Man & those that enable him… Amen.

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Disclaimer: Self-Preservation is Law. In order to preserve the self, I had to symbolically kill the “nigga man apologist” within. He’s been laid up on my proverbial couch, eating all my kids cereal, using up all the high speed data, making other nigga-men moor “sovereign” off MY dime 7years too long now. My 11year sun old is now 18. Gone off to college doing something with his life while you, the nigga-man, sell dreams to other women behind my back because you intuitively feel when a FEMALE is up to something… After all this time, NOW you feel me huh? What am I up too you ask? Hmph…

Call Tyrone

 

Dear Black Man, (not to be confused with the nigga-man above)

 

I know you don’t know me, but ive heard a lot about you. Read stories about your type. Dreamed of what its like to have you come home to me, the children, the dog, our home, after running successful businesses a couple days a week, but ive been wondering why don’t you see me? And I figured it out today. See a black MAN isn’t attracted to little girls, Be it in females under 18 OR over 25, only the “nigga-minded male,” is attracted to “little girls.”  And for the last 20years, regardless of the age/wage gap, this is the only type of “man” that seems to approach me. I mean, it makes sense because Continue reading The Eulogy: Here lies the Ni*ga Man & those that enable him… Amen. →

Clarity, Healing, Mental Health, Trauma

How To become a Predator…

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I was the new girl in town…Again!!

(Freshly raped and passed around at least twice by my two older male step-cousins, prior to being uprooted then transplanted in this same old weird paper-mill smelling town during my 7th grade school year) Except this time, it was for good.. The suicide attempt bought me a good year of freedom back in the safety and nurturing arms of my great grandmother back in my hometown but I just couldn’t seem to get right. Age 10, Still reeling from a traumatic loss of the one stable father figure I’d been blessed since my then teenaged parents proved to be incompetent, the depression teamed with hyper stimulated genitalia was becoming too much for my grieving great grandmother to bare… I would eventually end up rotating between one relative to the next. I cant remember exactly what happened that got me to this point, yet Here I am, the new girl once again…

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Sitting in Ms. O’s typing class, in front of me he sits. Braids to the back, toffee colored skin, cover-all jeans creased to the 9, gangsta Nike’s, basketball hoopin, nice flows, project living, all his brothers and sisters had different daddies but HE was the oldest.. I still remember his adams apple, the veins in his arms… On the outside he reminded me of my father. Except he wasn’t 6feet tall and black as midnight but he definitely fit his “thuggish” exterior.. I just KNEW he was gonna take me down through there.. As I sat on the backrow.. quiet as kept.. Never even giving him as much of a good morning… I observed him.. his mannerisms.. how he sharpened his pencil.. how he would make it a POINT to strut across the floor just to shoot paper in the trashcan like he was Jordan or somebody.. “What a show off,” I thought to myself.. As he sat down, a breeze would swoop past my nose and every damn time, i breathed him in.. Adiddas cologne to be exact.. Continue reading How To become a Predator… →