Tag Archives: love

Hail Mary!!!! of Magdalene that is…

Because you need new material, here’s a bone.

If you need quality healing you’re going to have to seek a seasoned professional. They say “hoes be winning these days” but here’s the kicker.. We never stopped!! Forced underground like the majick of our ancestors, we “Divine Whores” lay faithfully in wait of His great return..

 

It was our sacrifice that helped to Keep your picture perfect families in tact due to bullshit patriarchal hidden in plain sight, throw a rock hide ya hands boys will be boys under the rug sweeping backwards assed norms… For hundreds of years the whores have played “good girls” long enough. We watched our mother’s mother’s stick & stay for the APPEARANCE & the stability of that “D,” but no more. The sacredly divine Whore, respectfully referred to as the descendants of Mary Magdalene or her “dark side” of Lillith.. Medusa to Athena/Juno are here to serve, destroy & restore the rise of Our Great Mother. She has awakened within man as well given the great rise to Eunuch and to the Homosexual male, i salute your rise into power taking on this task of restoring balance from the inside-out. You won’t have to suffer much longer as with the Divine Whore now days we put it ALL out front..

As for the fall of good guys/gals they will now go into the shadows of their decency & morality. We’re in a time where everything must flip. Those who bought into the “good girl” narrative thus suppressing her calling into initiation from the divine Whore herself, she’s praying for a way out. The reality of this grave mismanagement of gift will cost her her livelihood, family, health or worse her sanity… But woe to the whores who followed his/her loins down the dark path of whoredom.. You may now take your throne with pure heart. Shamed, shunned, chastised & ostracized you are finally gaining the recognition you’ve always deserved. Your inheritance awaits.

Funny thing is that now all the lives youve touched, orally, anally, vaginally will no longer require physical contact. As you’ll soon realize all we have to do is embrace ourselves, clean up how we view our work, forgive the process that which created such a beautiful mess & like well, majick, we rise.. So yes, hoes be winning these days because we know what its like to lose. We’ve been playing psychotherapist to your spouse for 400years so noone knows the mind of Man better than the Whore sent here to set him free. We never shame those who seek true baptism by fountain or look down on them for wanting to explore our orifices like the nomadic entities they’ve always been. No, those were the “good girls” back in the good old days but now its OUR time to fly high.. tis the season ladies.. Happy Whoring!!!!

Yours Truly, Mother/Sister/Mistress
Saint Mary Magdalene…

This has been the Dragonfly Affect, thank you for Receiving, now share.

 

Overcoming Holiday Depression Anxiety.. And why I Am thankful..

Its no longer a debate on whether we came from a LONG line of emotionally unavailable women or not. Its no longer a debate of whether this system made her that way by stripping her of our father’s, her father literally &/or figuratively. But now that we’re here, the offspring generation Y, fully awakened & aware of said conditions looking around at this world as newborns.. like how did this happen? When the evidence lies within what of our remains bloodline..

1716760128-family-tree-clipart-black-and-white-family-tree-clipartfamily-tree-juhwdi-clipart

I remember Thanksgiving 2009.. My great grandmother had passed on MLK day bacin January 19. Couple months prior trying to be a team player going the extra mile for a certain pizza chain, ended up being T- boned by some idiot totalling my first ride.. a 99 Toyota Tacoma.. tore ligaments in my neck & for the first time in my life, I was terrified to drive.. I even started smoking cigarettes (one of two things besides adrenal gland fatigue that took my Mama Dea out.. along with her husband a few weeks prior to thanksgiving back in ’96)  just to drive again once I finally ran out of savings.. Fast forward to thanksgiving.. car-less, body broken, ego shattered, heart? (don’t mention it) And my aunt is on her way to pick me up to take me to be bombarded with memories of the staple of my life that no longer exists. the one person who never turned her back on me.. or it looked at me with disgust for being “broken”.. she was gone. Fast forward I decline the ride and to my surprise, no-one sent me a plate. They fed the “homeless” in Madison instead.. As punishment for not showing up, I didn’t “deserve” a plate. Which reminded me of that one Christmas mom didn’t but me anything because lets be honest.  i was a problem child.. year after year presents & plates were piled high for me.. I can’t remember the crap i was bought or the foods on those plates but I remember the disappointment.. the emptiness.. the rejection of not being understood. I learned just how cold & unsympathetic the black woman could truly be..

My new perspective is that they were grieving too.. And my not being there was a way to lash out for all the grief a sexually abused child brings upon a family. My not being there was a bitter sweet feeling because 1) I wasn’t a physical reminder of what the town knows happened 2) I gave in to depression. I was becoming a loser & a failure because I wasn’t as “strong” as them. I couldn’t just “put on” for a few hours and pretend to be overjoyed to see them.. make them feel better and it’s better they don’t have to see me. 3) more food for them

So I said all that to say this.. what my family doesn’t know is that I haven’t had an appetite on thanksgiving since ’95.. I have to force myself to eat every year during this time. I can’t smoke to provoke an appetite due to current profession so all that’s left to do is feel. And if I must say so myself, I feel more alive NOW than ever before. However I do understand why people feel anger, anxiety, depression during these times. It feels as if We’re stuck in bereavement mode, my generation. All this knowledge we have we just can’t seem to evolve past the pain. Pain, self victimization, self pity,  self sabotage, self neglect and all around trauma have become our normal. Granted some of us can & are doing the werk to evolve but there comes a time where one must separate others pain, their PAST trauma, their PAST hurts and embrace where they are right now. In the present.. Thanksgiving 2016, the outside world is “grieving” for native American struggles, all summer it was “black” lives, and today is a gumbo of the “world’s” pain and tragedy. And im over here like, nah. I still dont have an appetite but i DO have joy in my heart. I can actually FEEL love and compassion for others without feeling drained of life force. In ’09 my heart was filled with despair. 2013, I was praying for Trayvon, scared for my teenage male relatives.. 2015, I observed the final thanksgiving I was going to spend being “concious” 100% in my head about the knowledge & superior to my blood relatives.. true I would fake happy til this year but I made it through!!! I finally beat depression. I finally have my innocence.. my femininity.. my sensuality back and for that, I Am thankful. The world will burn I mean turn no matter what hashtag is popping this week. I Am thankful for moments of the present. And one day, this life or the next, so will you..

blessing2

Thanks for reading.

4. Reasons I won’t date Men with children…. AGAIN!!

Alrighty so by now (blog 5) we’re well aware that I’ve got some abandonment type issues.. sprinkle in a little sexual abuse.. public education… and KA-BOOM!!! Yea, cool story bro, right?

kandis-wedding-kandi

But see the that’s not why im  not interested in helping raise your little crumb snatcher.  Or maybe it is, we’ll see by the end of this piece. First let me take a few steps UP to the top of my high horse and give you a brief synopsis of how I know I’d suck as your kid’s step-parent…

Selfish. I truly suck at sharing things and unless we’ve been together for over 2-3years im probably not bored enough to meet your kids yet. Chances are im still enjoying that whole new car smell type loving & Who has the energy for those  impromptu calls about how Lil Timmy just broke his big toe at soccer practice and needs YOU to come tell your story about how back in Cooley High 1997 you played through your ACL injury and scorned the winning shot in triple over-time.. WHILE IN THE MIDDLE OF FUCKING COS-PLAY!!!! Got damn you Timmy get your coordination together, FUCK!!!

146541-angry-parent

Or my absolute personal favorite, I have to cheer your irritable ass up all because your whack ass child’s mother/ex-wife who don’t want their ex to be great without them, heard her babygirl tell her other sibling how much they like Ms. Dragonfly over her mean ass? How Ms. Dragonfly takes the time to cut up their meat, asks questions about their school day fucking colors with them? And because they actually WANT TO STAY with their daddy and his “new bitch” you purposely start beef just to keep them away from us/him.. You try to punish HIM by punishing the babies… Yea that’s my favorite. Nobody got the energy to build that man back up right after you hoes simultaneously ripped my heart from me….. Its like clockwork!!! Which leads me to #2….

1824717267-frustrated_2Bmom_2Bfunny_2Bfacebook_2Bstatus_2Bupdate

2. Attachment. In the last serious relationship I encountered, this man was probably the most dope MALE parent ive ever witnessed in for real life, but I knew it wasn’t going to last. I knew our relationship wasn’t going to go the distance yet after roughly 1.5 of dating then eventually living together, he introduced me to his children… ~sighs~ Lets back up a few years. Now I entered my first bid dealing with a grown aged male with children, back in ill say ’08 shortly after Continue reading 4. Reasons I won’t date Men with children…. AGAIN!!