Tag Archives: introspection

Yes, I Am Blessed. thanks for recognizing it!!

Been receiving a lot of “God bless you, have a blessed day” here lately. And for the first time in this life, I dont feel awkward hearing it. I actually say “thanks, you too!!” As opposed to that deer in the headlights look like “O-kay”

ūüėāūüėāūüėā You know what im going back to my real life diary lol f*ck yall!!! Get out my blessed ass life you heathens!! ūüėāūü§£ūü§£ #wonthedoit ūüôŹ

But seriously tho, I’m finally secure in my non-belief systems & practices so I’m already knowing AND receptive to the sentiment behind the gesture, be it “programmed” or not. I receive & reciprocate that energy to whomever shows appreciation of my light. I worked my ass off to get here & imma soak it in til I’m overflowing with that shit.. So, if you wanna “save” humanity, start with yourself.. That’s all. Thanks for reading tho‚úĆ #introspection #darkYogi #dragonflyAffect #traumaFree #packlight

You’re not as innocent as you think…

Because everybody’s a victim in 2017, or wants to play one, let me speak directly to those who are so helpless & innocent they can’t tell a broken fe/male from a [mostly] healed one..

I’m going to attempt to keep this brief & to the point. I’ve witnessed a lot of finger pointing going on between which came first chicken or the egg on these internet streets, when in reality they’re both the same chicken, just in different stages of life but I digress.

There’s an ongoing debate on whose at fault for the break down of the black community here in the West, so without getting too deep, let’s just say it’s my fault. 30yrs on this planet & I still view everything outside of me as OUT-SIDE of me.. Just Sit with that one for a minute..

By now you’ve survived all the trauma living in the first world has to offer. I know how tough it is having Indoor plumbing, ¬†access to the front entrance of anywhere you dare to purchase goods & services from, passports to leave and go wherever you want whenever you want.. not having drones bomb your entire neighborhoods, or better yet, having the freedom to parade through public streets full nude & proclaim that others are wrong for not embracing YOUR willingness to be well, butt-naked in public. It’s tough living like this, & things really need to change for the better, I totally get it. You’ve played the victim so long you can’t even tell you’ve actually become your captor.. You’ve actually become the predator we all love to hate.. Let me explain.

Continue reading You’re not as innocent as you think…

Nicki Minaj Envy… I totally get it!!

 

Here’s a brief synopsis of my observation over this whole Nicki Minaj Remy Ma beef thing..

 

Y’all are only team #Remy over #Nicki for the same reason folks are team #solange over #beyonce, period.. Keep reading I’ll explain.

Short Version: Trauma & Perpetual self victimization.. Anytime Remy opens her mouth all i hear hypermasculinity..anger pain.. then when i see her, i receive that confirmation.

When i hear Nicki’ s voice theres’s this childlike innocence within it, When i see her? Confirmation. This is a chick who still finds sanctity in playing dress-up.. Fearless, sensual femininity in This modern world & in today’s climate, that’s a BIG no-no.. It’s just not “safe” to be free, flouncing around in “silly” costumes, smiling from ear to ear everywhere you go..

That’s just not adult-like. And you people just couldn’t wait for the big bad wolf to eat her ass alive to prove how right you are about YOUR world…

You know, Remy reminds me of the misguided, disgruntled child with an alcoholic step dad & strung out mother for parental figures, who was forced to raise her siblings before her first menstrual flow.. #rootchakra #foundationsMatter Who then goes to school to pull the hair of the “pretty” girls, with clean clothes with parental figures who care about that child’s wellbeing. The one who all the little boys chase on the playground while calling HER their “homeboy” & getting punched in the shoulder as if she is one of the guys.. I get it. She’s the underdog. And we all love a good “started from the bottom” story to make us feel less miserable about our own shadows & sh*t.

 

I Totally get it..

 

Sooo, what did The Queen Beyonce & Solange have to do with this Made for tv lifetime movie script?

Well Solo, is the “rebellious” (pretty, but still) less pretty, less angelic, unapologetically querky, eccentric, outwardly aggressive hypermaculine version of Beyonce..

And lets be real, yall werent fucking with #solange until she jumped on Jay-Z (#misandry) then dropped ‘Dont Touch My Hair/Cranes’ at the height of your lil #blackGirlMagic ego boost campaign.. Yall wasnt seeing her back when she had regrets about T.O.N.Y so have a seat at the damn table & cut that bullshit out!!!

Now, Remy & Solange Are lyricists/writers while Beyonce & Nicki are performers.. Both highly respectable lanes with plenty of room for growth & evolution. There’s no real need to compete tbh.. but ya know, egoes & whatnot.

In closing, its all art to me either way you slice it. ¬†If you cant tell by now, im biased towards the more sensual feminine woman, versus hyper-aggressive boisterous women. ¬†I mean, I get it tho.. I’ve been hypermasculine for roughly 25years of my life & quite frankly, that shit was exhausting. Y’all can have at it tho. I’m just packing lighter these days. ¬†‚úĆ #traumaFree #lightYogi #dragonflyaffect #exBagLady¬†

Gross Negligence: Heart Chakra & the 7 stages of grief..

Throughout this blog, I’ve spoken strictly from the neglected root chakra perspective via childhood sexual trauma. As i work my way up the “self- correcting” ladder that is the chakra system, reprogramming generational effects of ¬†being born in the “first world.” As unsettling as it is, i have to admit that it’s become more evident, that we’re being attacked on all fronts.. simultaneously at the heart & root level.. There’s no reaching the crown without a fully activated heart.. there’s no reaching the heart when the foundation is cracked.. ironically the heart is the only organ standing at the gates that unites the upper 3 & lower 3 chakras. When an organism sees no benefit in its Being FULLY functional, that vital organ no longer has a purpose to fuel said organisms continued survival.

The Map of the Human Heart
The Map of the Human Heart

The heart is such a beautifully chaotic organ. On the surface all we see is the rhythmic pulsating action of said organ‚Äôs synchronized chaos involuntarily fighting for a living, breathing [both rebellious ungrateful, by society’s design] organism who refuses to even acknowledge its purposeful existence.

618322759

but before I get too deep, here’s a few meme’s depicting the collective mentality of a population under the influence of westernized “first world” culture.

 

d7292d7377dfd07774c01ef3bf034e00-260-260
Self Pity, Depression.. Shock.. Loss.

 

images
Self Defense.. fight, flight or freeze.

 

fuck-love-martinez-09
Groupthink, gang mentality influenced & backed by entertainment/music industry.

And in true westernized society fashion, I present to you… Supplementation.

05188b8ffa825563330101fbf0342d2b96a408-wm
Denial, Overworking/Over-extending ourselves into exhaustion… “Work/grind-a-holics” Independent/strong black women.. Facades.

 

fuck_love_do_drugs-816446
Self Destruction/Sabotage & Escapism,
tumblr_no9gpnjh6u1up837ko1_250
More Denial & Escapism..

Acceptance/Introspection.

31525_20130524_203440_hate_love_12
Acceptance, Introspection.. Growth.

 

It’s my observation that one has to experience all 7 stages of grief to activate all 7 chakras.. Yes, some stages repeat but that’s only because one hasnt mastered the lesson. Of course this is from a rudimentary perspective as I Am still coming into this Knowing of self. So with that being said, eventually I’ll go more in depth regarding each stage but im going to stop here for now. ¬†Thanks for reading.

 

Is you conscious or is you woke? I’m just asking…

dear-abby

Dear Dragonfly,¬†Why don’t YOU¬†focus on sexual abuse awareness and prevention¬†the way YOU used too when you first started blogging?! Well, to be quite honest, It was draining. I started losing myself in other folks neglect of their children. I started to try and “save” folks when its not MY job.. I had to come to a place of accepting that their battle is not MINE.. Yes, we have similar scars, similar weaponry.. enemy had the same skin color, but the “battle?” Nah, its their own.. and vice versa.. Shit I’m just here to assist by being an example, through the documentation of my OWN journey back to wholeness. ‚Ä™#‚ÄéselfPreservation #saviorComplex ‚Ĩ

So my question to YOU, dear innocent bystander,¬†is this…

Why don’t YOU speak on sexual abuse, the way you talk about these supreme ass white folks that wont GIVE YOU NO JOB, huh? Why don’t YOU share facts/memes about sexual abuse of black boys and girls the way you share footage of blacks being gunned down by scary ass SUPREME white folks…the way YOU share photos of our ancestors being hung from trees.. the way YOU talk about gay agendas.. the way you talk about aint no good men/women.. the way YOU talk about sports.. the way YOU drag religious folks… I’m just asking…

conscious or woke

 

Now, we don’t ALL know somebody that’s been hung from a tree, killed, or denied a job from some “supreme” entity…. but according to the stats http://newsone.com/1680915/half-of-black-girls-sexually-assaulted/¬†60% black females (and males, from the perspective of duality, as above so below, as within so without) will have been sexually assaulted by the age of 18… 60% of little black girls and 60% little black boys (separately but equally) have ALREADY been sexually abused/assaulted by their 18th birthday… SIX OUT OF TEN!!! 60/100 Black children… and in majority of these cases, guess what?? The perpetrator is another BLACK FEMALE OR BLACK MALE.. And 9/10, they are family &/or family acquaintance i.e someone the child’s family knows…From these statistics alone, you either ARE either 6/10 OR you’ve loved someone who’s apart of the 60%.. #introspection

13532758_1744109439199339_7409209767985861105_n

Hmph, so why don’t i spread the gospel about prevention and AWARENESS regarding sexual abuse in the black community the way I “used too” anymore? Oh yall are most definitely aware, matter of fact you’ve¬†BEEN aware for generations, actually.. Yall just¬†don’t [wanna] hear¬†these babies when they’re telling you the truth¬†tho. Too busy stuntin on your rivals just to show and prove you got somebody that comes home to you EVERY night. Knowing damn well they not coming home for you… They’re coming “home” because you’re knowingly, willingly sacrificing your own babies just to say you got somebody… Yea, I see you. ‚Ä™#‚ÄépickYourBattles‚Ĩ ‚Ä™#‚ÄéscapegoatSociety‚Ĩ ‚Ä™#‚ÄéAsAboveSoBelow‚Ĩ ‚Ä™#‚ÄérugSweepers‚Ĩ ‚Ä™#‚ÄétheDragonflyAffect‚Ĩ

Is you conscious or is you awake? I’m just asking… ‚Ä™#‚ÄéenemyWithinOrWithout‚Ĩ ‚Ä™#‚ÄéstopDeflecting

 

jonathan-mannion-discusses-shooting-dmx-0
Aint enough bleach in the world that can wash THIS amount of blood off your generational hands my “consciously aware” community.. Might as well face yourselves and bathe in it… There’s no “we before EYE” on this journey to recovery. The sooner you comprehend this the better. Self preservation is the ONLY law. Save yourselves first, or drown with the rest of the ship. #noIceberg With peace & chaos, Thank you for reading. –T. D Hooks

‬

The Eulogy: Here lies the Ni*ga Man & those that enable him… Amen.

Disclaimer: Self-Preservation is Law. In order to preserve the self, I had to symbolically kill the “nigga man apologist” within. He’s been laid up on my¬†proverbial couch, eating all my kids cereal, using up all the high speed data,¬†making¬†other nigga-men moor “sovereign” off MY dime¬†7years too long now.¬†My 11year sun old is now 18. Gone off to college doing something with his life while you, the nigga-man, sell dreams to other women behind my back because you intuitively¬†feel when a FEMALE is up to something… After all this time, NOW you feel me huh?¬†What am I up too you ask? Hmph…

Call Tyrone

 

Dear Black Man, (not to be confused with the nigga-man above)

 

I know you don’t know me, but ive heard a lot about you. Read stories about your type. Dreamed of what its like to have you come home to me, the children, the dog, our home,¬†after running successful businesses¬†a couple days a week, but ive been wondering why don’t you see me?¬†And I figured it out today.¬†See a black MAN isn’t attracted to little girls, Be it in females under 18 OR over 25, only the “nigga-minded male,”¬†is attracted to¬†“little girls.” ¬†And for the last 20years, regardless of the age/wage gap,¬†this is¬†the only type of “man” that seems to¬†approach me. I mean, it makes sense because Continue reading The Eulogy: Here lies the Ni*ga Man & those that enable him… Amen.